Happy Mothers Day!

I'm celebrating Mothers Day today.

I've never auditioned for anything before so it was surprising when I felt the urge to jot down the audition details calling for an essay about motherhood. I felt compelled, and it's always been good to follow that feeling.

Nothing was really coming to mind about what to write, but during a rare quiet moment, the idea came and my house fell apart while I spent a day writing it. I finished it minutes before driving up to Salt Lake to audition. The audition was one on one, very low-key and comfortable. Heather Johnson was kind and sweet. I left thinking all in all it was fun to write, and fun to stretch my comfort zone.

I was thrilled when I received the email telling me I had made the cast for the show! I ran to the backdoor in my underwear and shouted out to my husband, "Guess WHAT!? I won! I get to be on the show!" To which he congratulated me and I ran back to my room to read more about it- ducking low to avoid the kitchen windows.

Then I saw the rest of the cast and perused all their amazing writing...and I started to feel intimidated.

I went to our first  rehearsal, on the way there praying that I would at least speak coherently. Just minutes in, we were laughing and sharing. I was enchanted by all these amazing women as they read their truly beautiful essays on all facets of motherhood. I remembered how much I loved writing. I love how it connects you straight to the soul.

I left thinking about The Element by Ken Robinson and what he writes about finding your tribe. "What connects a tribe is a common commitment to the thing they feel born to do." "Finding your tribe can have trans formative effects on your sense of identity and purpose." I wondered if these women would find me presumptuous if I told them I thought they were my tribe.

Inspired, I started to write again. My family has noticed how significantly happier I've been. I so needed this.

Tonight is the Listen to Your Mother show. The first Utah show. This afternoon I sat on the bathroom counter in my underwear to pluck my eyebrows in the good light and smiled at the memory of watching my mother do the same thing and thought of her smell and her beauty. I got ready in a quiet house and had time to reflect on the peace because my sweet sister is watching my kids. I put on beautiful new clothes and felt so loved by my husband who drove an hour last night to buy me just the shoes I wanted.

I'm on my way to prepare for the night with these beautiful women who accept me and encourage me.

You know how it feels when you are really thirsty and you drink a full glass of cold water- how you can feel it spread out through your body, simultaneously filling and soothing. That's how I feel tonight.

I am grateful this mothers day: Grateful for the compelling feeling that led me to this moment. Grateful for the understanding that as women we need each other.

Happy Mothers Day.


Emily@Little Forever Family said...

So excited! I wish I could be there! You will do awesome. One of my adoption peeps is also participating (Lindsay R., from the R house).

AaronsherriHatch said...

You are so brave and I love your story it made me laugh out loud. You will be awesome as always! I can't write or speak thoughts very well,that is something special you have there KEEP IT UP! Its fun to read :)

Ammon said...

Happy Mothers Day Abby! You performed wonderfully, your story was excellent and you looked amazing. I am so happy that you are the mother of my children. Thank you!

melissa said...

Your essay really rocked. I'm so glad I could see you! Let's talk awkwardly on the phone soon.

Amy Hackworth said...

Abby, so fun to read that you felt compelled to this process and that it reopened the door to writing for you. How cool! Your essay and demeanor are beautiful and inspiring.

Jewels said...

I love the way you described your experience. I think we all got more out of it than we expected. And, yes, a tribe. That is what we are.
(I know what you mean about writing. It makes me happy, too.)

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